The art of shutting the fu*k up.
I recently turned 35, eeek.
Yeah i know, it's not that old, but let me tell you i feel 150 right now.
The last year was pretty intense for me. I had a really, really hard pregnancy. Marley's arrival into the world was a rocky one, more as promised on that later. My husband went through a rough time at work and witnessing him go through that turmoil was particularly draining and we experienced some other unwelcome family issues that to say the least was upsetting and stressful.
I held a lot in, i buried some stuff pretty deep and i started to really neglect myself, like bad.
All my other day to day tasks which to some i know seem pretty mundane like the school run, lunch boxes, homework, walking the dog, groceries, work, writing and laundry took over and i put self-care on the back burner.
The physical stuff i can deal with and it doesn't bother me. Yes i will get a hair cut, i will fix my re-growth, try and work out more and eat better. But what does get me is trying to switch off my brain.
I can't. It's mission impossible in there.
All day i'm talking, organising, fixing, yelling, explaining, working, and by the end of the day there's a million voices buzzing around in my head. Those voices like to keep me up at night too by the way!
I've recently made a pact with myself to learn how to meditate and switch off. It's something i've always wanted to do. I'm going to try and shut the fu*k up for at least five minuets a day. Now this sounds a lot easier that it is. Especially with an 11 month old. Five mins a day is like 8 hours in baby time!
I recently downloaded the Headspace app and have been loving it. It guides you along the way which is great for beginners and is a pretty casual meditation session for someone who's still sussing things out.
I've been deep into researching tips for how to get started on a journey to meditate and here's what i've found.
1. Start out meditating for 2-3 mins first then gradually add a min when you feel ready.
2. Try and meditate at the same time everyday, if you can.
3. Don't get caught up in how your doing or if your doing it right, just go with it.
4. Acknowledge yourself. Note what feelings your bringing into the session. Tired? Angry? and allow yourself to feel them.
5. Do a body scan. Follow your breath as you inhale and exhale around your body. Start by visualising at one end of your body and gradually move to the opposite end.
6. Let go. Don't try and control your mind. Let it wander but remember to always bring it back to focusing on your breathing.
7. Take a big deep breath and exhale when your done and finish with a smile. Acknowledge that you have done this for yourself and end it on a happy note.
And that's it, starting off slowly and having obtainable goals will be the key to making this a regular self-care step.
Bring on the clarity!